The first is easy to fix. The second is hard to notice. The third is tough to say. The fourth is difficult to confront.
“You’ve got to be more honest, Andy.” My friend said after I laughed at a joke I didn’t find funny. “You try to make everyone happy, but I can see it doesn’t make you happy.”
He told me that I did that a lot.
What hurt most was not being called out by someone I love, but that he made me confront what I’d been denying for years, and that was pleasing others so I could belong.
“We cannot change anything until we accept it.” Carl Jung added bluntly.
That day I had to accept it. I had to accept that I wasn’t doing the person I laughed along with, nor my friend, nor myself any favours by not being true. No one wins from a lack of authenticity. And not being authentic was something Carl Jung said was worth worrying about in life.
Below are a few more.
1. Living An Unexamined Life
Having people like my friend in my life has helped me examine why I laugh at jokes I don’t find funny, why I play the nice guy, and why it’s important for me to fit in.
